Embracing Slavery

In moments of great appreciativeness, I'll often feel rather obligated to my parents. They have done so much for me. They never let my toothbrush get frayed bristles. They make me my favorite foods (there happen to be a lot of those, so it's actually not that hard :). They keep a roof over my head. I get the occasional warm shower (depends whether the pellet stove is up to temp or not). They loved me before I knew that I loved them.

So at times, it's easy to feel indebted to them. But periodically I wonder...perhaps that debt is not so great as it seems. First of all, they tell me that they apparently enjoy us kids. And enjoyment runs pretty expensive these days, so that knocks off quite a bit. Second--and I think this just might be why some families have so many kids--it's because we make good slaves. We are cheap labor. Cheaper than illegal immigrants, in fact, and you don't even have to worry about the INS showing up at your door. Actually, we are so cheap that we are free (aside from the semi-occasional ice cream bribe). And not only are we cheap, we are efficient. We get work done and we get it done quick. We are also extremely easy to take advantage of. Probably because our parents know we do feel slightly indebted to them.

It's not just our own parents though. Other parents take advantage of other parents' kids. For example, we (as in, 17 kids and a few adults) were hanging at the Slacks, and before we knew it we (the 17 kids) had been commissioned to pick up all the apples that fell off the ornamental apple tree. Suddenly we were down on our hands and knees throwing squishy apples into a wheelbarrow. It took two heaping loads, 34 hands, and 20 minutes to get the job done. Now, if Mr. And Mrs. S had had to complete that job themselves, it would have taken over an hour. Instead they had us kids do it.

There is also Grandma. She is hosting Uncle Bruce's wedding to Annie (my super awesome Italian  soon-to-be-aunt who is emigrating from Canada to marry him), and the guest list has gone from "strictly family" with 45 people to "I've met you before" with 90 people. Grandma is also making lots of food for the occasion, and delegating the making of the rest of it. Note the delegating part. So here was an opportune time for my title as "slave" to be reinforced, and I've spent the afternoon baking Italian bread. I've been blogging during the rising stages. So far I have four loaves, but I'll make another four tomorrow. And then depending on what Grandma says, I may have to make more. Granted, in the very beginning I did sort of volunteer to make the bread. However, it was a forced volunteer because she started going through the list of everything that needed to be done, and who was doing what so far, and my name was on neither list. You know how grandmas are. They get you to do things without asking, though it's really like they did ask because they hint around so much. And yet they seem so happy and surprised and grateful when you volunteer to help out. As if they didn't know they had forced you into it.

And then last week dad needed his office landscaped since Sheets is going in and we need to look snazzier then them. He was going to hire Ben P. to do it, but Ben was busy. So instead, he commissioned us kids (I should stop using the word "commissioned" because that makes it sound like we are getting paid). So we got up early Saturday morning, drove to Mansfield, and proceeded to yank weeds, shovel bark mulch, rake grass, and dig holes (to put mums in. Unfortunately, I didn't get the "buy flowers with mom and then decide where they should go" job. I got the manual job). Of course, all for free. And that is actually the 50th time we have landscaped dad's office...Then the next day we worked here at our house, since Uncle Bruce's wedding is next week and the guests just might drive up the road to turn around in our driveway and they just might utterly scrutinize what our house looks like. So more weeding. More mulching. Raking.

Yet, whether it's Mr and Mrs S, or grandma, or my parents, I don't blame them. Because one, it just shows how brilliant they are by surpassing the cultural average of 1.5 kids per family, and people deserve to show off their brilliantness sometimes. Two, it's because I am going to do the exact same thing to my future kids.