Where I Am and Where I Am Not

At present, I am quite happy not to be packing my bags. Happy I'm not sorting through what to take to a dorm room. Happy not to be spending the last few days of summer vacation trying not to think of the goodbyes that will soon be said. Because:

1. I love my family.

This is not implying that I have attachment problems. Actually, I was just thinking how really, for the first time, I actually feel like I could leave my family for an extended period and not die. For once in my life I feel capable, like I could survive on my own at a campus. It is rather reassuring, because this time last year I wasn't able to dream of leaving home. Which goes to show that there is a reason people usually graduate when they are 18--it's because they are ready, like I was not last year at 17, at least emotionally. Back to the main point though: yes, I could leave, but I don't want to because I am rather fond of my mom and dad and younger brothers and sisters. Isaac, who protects me from marauders and provides me with an unceasing stream of scientific facts...that sometimes include so many universal statements you question just how factual they are, but hey, he gets an A for effort. Maryah, who knows my inside jokes and gets me out of sticky situations...even if she is rather impish. Misha, who sticks to my side like Grandpa sticks to Rush Limbaugh's radio talk show, and keeps the creative side of my brain working. She's my #1 sous chef, because even though I think, initially, that she will get in the way, some of the best things I've made, she's come up with or helped me with. Sanna, who is an endless source of smiles and laughter...a lot of which has to do with the fact that she is a merciless tickler and I am unable to defend myself against her, but usually just because I love her and she is funny. And of course Andrew, even though he isn't home all that often. When he is, I swear life is more fun, we laugh more, and everything just goes a lot more smoothly.

2. I love my friends.

I know I could make new friends if I left. But why bother making new ones when the ones I have right now are the best ever? Besides, when you leave, it's pretty much a given that you will lose touch with them somewhat, unless you try really hard. And usually you are trying so hard to get an A in biochem that you can't try hard staying in touch with old friends while in the midst of making new ones. 

I've been thinking a lot recently about friendships, what it takes to make them and continue them, and what makes people click. Probably has something to do with the fact that I'm writing a research paper on the subject for my communications class--ha ha--but we'll just pretend I've been thinking about relationships of my own accord. And I've arrived at the conclusion proposed above: I love my friends. And there is no way I am going through life without them. No way I'm dumping them for college. :) 

3. I love my home.

I'll be one of the first to say that location doesn't really matter as long as you are with people you love--because it's the people you love that make home--but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate my surroundings. On the contrary, this summer, really even just this past week, I have been blown away at how beautiful it is here. Even though I'm seeing this all for the umpteenth time. The hills and the trees and sky. The fields, and my turbulent amber waves of grain. The wildflowers. The morning sun shining through the eastern woods. The magnificent sunsets every single evening. A bright orange newt on a sparkling wet green leaf. Juicy blackberries hidden between thorns. And the wind. Which technically you can't see, but it does something spectacular to everything. The sky too. I know I already said that, but I'm mentioning it again because it is my favorite. Blue. And even more beautiful when there are some clouds in it. One day, I'm going to visit someplace on earth where there is the widest amount of sky to be seen. I'm not sure if that means sailing out to the middle of the ocean, or standing on a high mountain, or going out west somewhere...but I'm going to find it, enjoy it, and then come back home and appreciate my own piece of sky all the more because I will know its potential. 

Speaking of places far far away...

Somalia has me quite perturbed at the moment. What are they thinking? Starving 600,000 kids to death by a famine that could have been prevented. That is the kicker. It was preventable. As Bono said last night, when it comes to droughts, go ahead and blame God, but famines are caused by man. They knew last November that this famine was going to happen. But Al-Shabaab keeps killing aid workers and keeping others out, then doesn't allow kids to get inoculated so they are dying all over the place from measles. They even banned Somalians from making a certain kind of bread because it is shaped like half a crucifix. If you ask me, I think Al-Shabaab is purposely inadvertently killing everyone who lives there. It's hideous. And it makes me want to do something. I'm just not sure what. Piracy is one thing, but putting little children through the slow, gruesome, painful death of starvation is quite another. 

I think I am going to have to listen to Matisyahu's One Day to cheer up now. You should too. He is my favorite Jewish rap artist. Okay, so he's the only Jewish rap artist I know of....but...that's beside the point. Just listen to it already.